Gag
by Yukitsu
Summary: Crack. Geneiryodan Arc, Yorkshin. My take on how Kurapika changed from his secretarial clothes to his tribal attire. And Kuroro's gag.


**Gag**

By Yukitsu

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Disclaimers: Hunter x Hunter is not mine! XD

Warning: Crack, badly written endings, mildly OOC Kuroro. I am obviously trying to squeeze in what slash I can get from the little amount of interaction these two had.

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"Boxers, Kuruta?" Kuroro said, tone laced with mild curiosity as he tilted his head to the side from his seat on the bed. The said Kuruta whipped around, halfway through pulling his _skirt _down, of all things, and just this close to revealing apparently lovely legs. Kurapika, as the man who drove them there regarded him, directed on him a glare packed with an amount of hostility that would make lesser men cower in unholy fear.

Kuroro could practically feel the hate jolting through the length of chain securely wrapped around him. He gave an amused smile and took the opportunity to study the hissing and bristling half-undressed boy in front of him.

The Kuruta had taken off the horrible secretarial clothing he used as a disguise and was down to his skintight lavender-and-black tank top, and dark blue boxers. The older man was almost disappointed the underclothes were so plain, though he supposed he should have expected it given that the boy looked some kind of a stiff.

"Go on, then. Get dressed before you catch a cold," he said nonchalantly, turning on his less than adequate seat to face elsewhere and ironically give his captor his privacy. Elsewhere turned out to be the window.

_No wonder he passed for a girl so easily,_ Kuroro mused, continuing his observation through the reflection and licking the new hole on his gums were one of his teeth used to be. Kurapika was rather lightly muscled and deceptively slender, with the complexion and facial features not usually found in teenage boys. He supposed it was because life as an orphan stunted the boy's growth – Coltopi and Feitan, Kuroro remembered, were good examples. Body strength wasn't based on how big the body was, but rather on how the moves were harnessed to one's advantage. Kuroro could appreciate the way Kurapika's body was built – for speed, grace, and agility, unlike how some of the members of his group were. Ubogin came to mind easily.

Ubogin. His _Nen_ was of the Strengthening Type, and to utilize this to its maximum, Ubogin had been a brute – this was easy to deduce from the first glance of the man alone. Kurapika, on the other hand, displayed signs that he was of the Control type. Kuroro had a lot of doubt on this – chains did not appear out of nowhere, even if Kurapika somehow managed to hide their presence with _In. _

Kuroro reviewed what he could of Kurapika's random power displays. There was too much chain to hide, even under that secretarial outfit. He was a Materialization type, like Coltopi and Shizuku, then? If so, it could not have been possible for him to have beaten Ubogin, especially when considering the fact that he had been a Hunter for less than a year.

The Limitation and Pledge. That was the only way for him to give the chains the capability to force _Zetsu_ upon an enemy and improve its strength to match its victim's physical power – Kuroro was no Ubogin, but he was still of above average physical strength. If he tried hard enough, he would be able to break chains similar to the Kuruta's in less than a minute. He gave up trying after the first half an hour.

That wasn't enough, however. There was more to it than simply the contract, some other way for the Kuruta to amplify the chain's strength. Was it anger and hate? Kuroro had his doubts about that – there were people who had more reason to hate their group than the boy tensely getting dressed behind him, though he had to admit they were few and far in between. None of them displayed this kind of power.

Kuroro pushed the question a little further back in his mind; he would have other opportunities to get his answers, and he always did.

That small a body against the huge hulk that was Ubogin. Kuroro regretted not having watched the fight. It would have been interesting to observe the boy's skill out in the open.

The boy had finished pulling on a white, baggy pair of pants and was in the process of slipping on a matching shirt.

"Sleepwear, Kuruta?"

There was more hissing and bristling, and some well-said foul words. Even with the Nostrad girl's prediction, Kuroro almost thought the chains would break him in half from the blond's agitation. Kurapika did not do anything but rein his temper in, however, and continued dressing.

It was impressive how the chain links would break away from his hand when he had to slip something, his sleeves or the armhole of that terribly colored vest, on yet none of the links binding him weakened at all.

"You already have me, Kuruta," Kuroro said as the blond pulled an equally tasteless orange-and-blue skirt on over the pants, "There is no need for you to keep on wearing female clothing to fool the rest of the Spiders." He turned around just in time to meet the glare from almost-glowing dark eyes. He knew the boy's eyes were red under the contact lenses, and chuckled.

Always the feisty spitfire ready to deliver rightful retribution, wasn't he? Kuroro had nothing to be afraid of, and everything to be amused at.

"I would appreciate it if you would kindly tell me when we are due to leave," he said, cocking his head to the side. No answer met his query; Kurapika merely kicked the secretarial clothing aside and rummaged around a pack on a chair.

"Am I allowed to rest? Where shall I settle myself?"

No answer.

"Are you going to let me have the bed, or were you planning on sharing it with me?"

A sudden tension around the shoulder, but nothing else. A thought passed through his mind, and his smile widened by a fraction of an inch.

"You're wearing Kuruta tribal clothing, aren't you? I thought you were still playing around with female clothes; I should have recognized that, forgive me for saying this, hideous color combination your kin were so fond of."

Kuroro blinked and the first thought that came to mind was that the _Nen _chains actually tasted metallic. The next was that the boy actually stuffed the chains in and around his mouth.

He was gagged until the exchange.

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6:58 PM 8/4/2005

Ah, late post. Uh. And a Merry Christmas to all?


End file.
